Hey Mama, it's time to get real
Counselling for Motherhood
Motherhood is a transformative journey, a profound experience that turns us inside out and our world upside down. Regardless of what happens, it is sure to reshape our identity, our relationships, our careers and our lives. As a mother myself, I have a deep passion for supporting women through the entire arc of motherhood, the grief and the gains: from conception and pregnancy to birth and beyond.
Why should you do this?
Like any relationship, the one you have with your child is sure to make you question a lot of what you have ever known to be true about yourself. The stress of holding it all together and trying to be a present mother can really send us over the edge… or close enough to feel concerned (you know what that looks like).
As a mother, your well-being is crucial. Your joy and contentment profoundly impact not only your own mental and physical health but also the well-being of your children. Mothering brings up a multitude of feelings, and not all of them are comfortable. It's not fun to realise a small human has so much power over your sense of stability!
As we nurture our children, we often consciously or unconsciously revisit the patterns of caregiving we received in our own childhoods. These patterns influence our parenting and the way our kids attach to us. It takes a significant amount of self-reflection and self-awareness to recognize these patterns – and, if necessary, consciously choose to create new, healthier ones.
Those moments when we melt down over our toddler's meltdown or feel like we're about to explode, are powerful indicators of our own upbringing. If we take a moment to pause (and have a bit of self-compassion) we can start to answer questions like these:
- How were we mothered?
- What was our attachment to our own parents like?
- What aspects of our family history do we want to carry forward, and what do we want to leave behind?
These questions remain relevant as our children grow and our relationships with them evolve. Finding answers to these questions is not about criticising our own parents; rather, it is about seeking truth, releasing the past if necessary, and making conscious choices to parent in the way we aspire to.
The Intention
While motherhood counselling shares many aspects with individual counselling, it provides a dedicated space to explore the unique period you find yourself in: the joys, the crazy-making challenges and the transformations of motherhood. This is a place to rant, to vent, to get it all out and then… to breathe deeply, reflect, get up and try again. We have to show up to our kids on a moment-by-moment basis. How do we do this and still show up to ourselves? And, how do we do this in a way that makes life a little easier?
Joining sessions with a motherhood focus, gives you the space to set specific intentions for the kind of parent you want to be. This doesn't mean you need to be perfect, but rather it's about cultivating conscious awareness and compassionate self-reflection. This is the "good-enough mother," (a concept derived from developmental psychology) the one who is gentle with herself and her imperfections, while still showing up for her kid in the best way she knows how.
Come on Mom, take the leap, your children will thank you for it in their own therapy later.
